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Quotes from Bogart’s:

“I hate it when the tip falls out.
OWW!!! Opps, sorry honey.”
“She’s been asking all the guys to pull it out.”
“Yup, she’s on my To-Do list.”
“Yeah, she’s on my To-Do list too.”
Me: “Thanks for the head.”
Bartender: “You’re welcome.”
–After receiving a draught beer with a lot of ‘head’ on it… she got it, right after she said it. Bogart’s Cocktails
Bartender: “Cash, credit or sexual favors?”
Me: “You know, I’m gonna take you up on the sexual favors! Would you like a Mustache Ride?”
–She never expected it from me. Bogart’s Cocktails

From other bars:

“I’m leaving in 10 minutes to go home and fuck my boyfriend, so NO, I’m not interested!!!”
–Young woman at the Rusty Nail (Clifton Park, NY) to a male patron who just didn’t get it.
“…I haven’t washed my scrotum in over a month.”
–A regular [functional drunk] at the Union Inn (Schenectady, NY)
Patron: “She beat me again.”
Bar Owner: “Yeah, cuz she’s better at swallowing.”
–Response to a guy loosing an Irish Carbomb drinking contest, Union Inn
“New Rule, no mooning the other players at the poker table.”
–Poker Tourney Director, The Afternburner (San Antonio, TX)

Miscellaneous quotes:

“Politically Incorrect operations of a turbine jet engine: suck, squeeze, bang and blow.” — James H.
“May all your ups and downs be between the sheets.” — Bartenders toast

Quotes